Constant arguing: Disagreeing with your partner is a normal thing in a relationship but the problem comes in when those disagreements turn into arguments. If you find yourself arguing over any and every little thing, that’s a problem. Couples/Adults should be able to agree to disagree without arguing. Although, some people are not equipped with proper communication skills, which is why couples counseling may be a good idea but both parties must be open and willing to get help.
Wanting more time away from your partner: When you find yourself wanting to spend less time with your significant other, that’s a sign something isn’t well in paradise. You may be experiencing personal issues within yourself, but when you feel you must isolate yourself away from your partner, that’s a problem. You should never feel like you don’t want to burden your partner with “your” issues that’s a sign that you feel that your partner may not be concerned with you. It is understandable not to want to be negative or drain other’s energy with your problems, but if you can’t go to your partner with your problems, who should you go to?
Lack of support: When you begin to realize you are not being supported in your relationship whether it be mentally, emotionally, financially, etc. that is a red flag that you may want to pay attention to what’s going on in your relationship. At no point in a relationship should you ever feel that you have to turn to someone that isn’t your partner for support. Don’t get me wrong, it is important to have someone outside of your relationship to vent to, but with certain things you want to take to your partner you should be able to. Your partner should feel that it is a privilege to be with you, and if they don’t support you why are you with them?
Aggressive/ passive aggressive: If you or your partner begins to become mean or “jokingly” mean out of nowhere these are signs that your partner is feeling some way about you that isn’t necessarily good. Have you ever heard the saying, “there’s always a little truth behind a joke”? Well there may be, now I’m not saying to become sensitive every time someone makes a joke, but what I am saying is take heed when people use you as the butt of jokes. Everyone will not come out and say how they really feel about you, but their actions will always show you. Jealousy or
Controlling: You should never stay in a controlling or jealousy filled relationship. Relationships like that almost always lead to abuse, resentment, etc. If it is you being the controlling or jealous person, you need to seek help. Most people who must control someone are very insecure and not in control of themselves emotionally. Why would you want to put your life in the hands of a person like that? Too many times do we as women trust men & women, only to be failed by them only to realize you can’t fully trust other’s to care for you how you would care for yourself.
Abuse: Abuse should not be tolerated, PERIOD. For some people it is harder to leave than others because of financial or emotional reasons, which is understandable. But you must ask yourself if you’re life means more to you or not. Yes, it may be hard on your own at first, but in the long run your safety and peace of mind is what you will really yearn for and you will thank your future self for putting yourself first. Plus, if you have children you don’t want them to see an abusive relationship. Studies show that children who witness abuse end up becoming abusers themselves or being abused. Think about that.
This advice applies to any and every relationship. Friends family, associates, coworkers, etc. While each relationship is different and there’s no one right answer this is just to spark a thought in your mind if you’re experiencing any of the above. Or give the person who’s second guessing their relationship that push they need to make an informed decision. We tend to forget that life is short and that we can be anything we want to be in the time we’re on Earth. We don’t have to stay in toxic or negative situations. We always hear, but I love you or I’ll change, or this is what my parents did and they’re still together. It’s not worth it, move on. Learn from your mistakes and don’t justify anything. If you treat yourself better guaranteed the next person you encounter will treat you better. Don’t ever be afraid to do what’s best for you.